The morning sunlight angles across the wooden floor marking the passage of time as customers come and go at Common Grounds Coffee Shop in downtown Denver. I have spent the last two hours trying to resolve a pending domain transfer of onebrightpearl.org, soon to be the blog that will document the next several years of living homeless in Denver while practicing zazen in the parks and supporting myself through takuhatsu.
I find repeating in my head the singular question, who benefits from this? Dogen Zenji continuously urges penetrating self inquiry into one’s motivation for practicing the Way. It can never be acceptable within the great lineage of the Buddha and his disciples to practice for ones own gain. To do so is to slander the Buddha Dharma and places one a million miles apart from the pure practice of zazen without hope or gain.
According to my teacher, Shohaku Okumura Roshi, Dogen Zenji defines offering or dana as “not being greedy”. Can I practice zazen without being greedy? With no expectation of reward? Honestly, I recognize that there is one thing I covet and pray for, the kasaya or kesa, often asking the Buddha, Bodhisattva-Mahasattva’s and all Buddhist Teachers throughout the ten directions and six worlds to please grant me the merit and protection of the kasaya. Leaving this aside though, my only wish is that I live this vow, to wholeheartedly practice Zazen as taught and passed down through Dogen Zenji’s enduring Dharma.
